Greta's Gaza flotilla: mutinies, violence and course change

Violence on Greta's boat: from vegan mutiny to Gaza course

The Freedom Flotilla that left Barcelona for Gaza has accumulated a series of internal conflicts: mutinies, parallel governments and desertions. The latest episode, according to circulating testimonies, is a forced change of course due to lack of supplies and pressure from organizers. Greta Thunberg would have been removed from leadership after trying to impose a shamanic ritual that ended with the «Stop Genocide» banner scorched.

The satirical diary that has gone viral on social media describes a crew on the verge of collapse: cosmic she-wolf, partying jihadists, parallel governments and a dolphin named honorary president. Reality, less literary, points to a logistical crisis and a trickle of voluntary departures.

A vegan mutiny and three governments at sea

The trigger was a can of tuna hidden in a backpack. The vegan faction demanded an expiatory sacrifice and the anarchist-party group turned the cellar into a disco. Amid the chaos, Ada Colau came out of hiding to self-proclaim herself floating mayor. The parody, published by an ABC columnist, portrays a crew unable to agree even on the menu.

The most shared messages speak of metaphorical "pickaxe blows": the left eliminating the annoying element, as was done with Trotsky. The historical reference, brought by a participant, serves to illustrate the internal fracture.

Why is there talk of a course change towards Gaza?

Because, according to circulating accounts, someone tightened the screws: a mortar-load of euros and the demand to focus on Gaza. Greta imposed herself and, immediately afterwards, was sidelined. The ship would head for the Greek islands to continue the pleasure cruise, according to the most cynical version.

The crossing, which should have lasted days, drags on. A participant calculates they have taken twenty days to go from Barcelona to Tunisia, a distance a sailboat covers in less than a week. Lack of supplies and personal wear explain the trickle of desertions.

Crew profile: from partying jihadist to president dolphin

The parody describes a young woman who boasts of being a jihadist and goes drunk from waking up until going to bed, eating humanitarian aid. Others speak of "vodka chestnuts" and seasickness pills that turn out to be fake. Susan Sarandon, announced as the alucinación's star, has disappeared from all reports.

ABC columnist Jorge Bustos signs the satirical diary that has circulated widely online. In it, Greta writes in her cabin and calls Columbus "the first fascist in history." The joke has generated memes and requests for a TV series.

Shadow of desertion and uncertain future

As they approach the conflict zone, casualties increase. The threat of being detained or shot by Israeli authorities accelerates departures. Chanquete's boat has new lyrics: "Greta's boat to Gaza won't come."

Nobody knows how many remain on board. The only certainty is that the project, presented as a humanitarian gesture, has become a labyrinth of egos and desertions. The question is no longer if they will arrive, but who is left to tell the story.