Viral quiz claims to measure your physical age through masturbation accuracy

The quiz that promises to calculate your real physical age has a catch: it doesn't ask about your heart, but about your aim.

Imagine you're looking for an online health test and you come across a form asking what position you toca in, whether you aim at the curtain or the ceiling, and whether you've ever stained the row behind you at the cinema. Welcome to the most absurd (and funniest) method for measuring your physical age: a thread that piles up laughs and confessions.

The science of 'skill beats strength'
Participants divide life's stages according to dexterity and control. At 14, according to the thread's folk wisdom, you aim at the curtains. With age, precision is lost: "the day will come when it just dribbles," one declares. Others fondly recall the target on the bathroom wall of their youth. The conclusion isn't medical, but nobody disputes that the strength of the stream wanes over the years.

The dark side of the test: deleted videos and prostates
Between jokes, some poor soul deleted a post with "potrankas and mañacas" antiestéticaturing Gianna Michaels and Alexis Fawx. One user blames those videos for his prostatitis: "not even at 14 had I shaken it out that much." The line between humor and real damage blurs. The thread, deleted, left a void that only the meta-analysis of collective idiocy can fill.

The test, in reality, doesn't exist as such. It's an excuse to share war stories and laugh at yourself. Real physical age, according to this yardstick, is measured by the angle of the nocturnal emission and the ability to launch the load at the neighbor. A foolproof method to know that, whatever you do, you'll always be a loser.

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